lalalalala.. wheeee

We were in love before
But now it's so much more
Cause when I kiss your lips I can't explain
What I feel in my heart for you
I don't know what I'd do
Baby if I lost you
Cause I've been without you and I know how it feels
And I can't be alone anymore
I know its more than love
Baby I can feel it
When I'm close to you
I know its more than love baby do you
Maybe my words can't explain
Why I'm feeling this way

effing sweet song innit?
its more than love by Los Lonely Boys
arif told me to dl it

i swear to God its so sweet i ended up listening to it over and over again
haha
i love the lyrics and the meaning behind the lyrics.

i'm just so high nowadays
yay
no longer depressed..
well no longer depressed much
[:

well at least its an improvement ryte??

anyhoooo
moving onnn..
i'm happy now and thats all that counts
coz you should live in the moment
if you dont you never know whether you'll get that moment back again.

To all of you who always tell me
"Ya Allah normah not again"
i'm sorry its not my fault things happen.
but the very least you should be happy that i'm happy.
and if you can't even do that i'm sorry.
i'm not gonna try and convince you.

but you know what i'm happy now and thats that.

lol...

goshhh i just feel so high ryte now!!!
but its a nice feeling.
way niiiiiiiiiiice..
lol.

but i read something that i really liked..
so i'm just gonna end this blog with that
[:

Love can be private and public, but it is never inappropriate...
and it should be kept that way. .<33

normah van houdt naem.. my ass!!!

i'm single but unavailable.
i'm free but tied.
hahahaha

[you knoe sometimes i feel so sad bout keeping this blog but who cares.]

bottom line naem is no more.
after one week and two days.
and i'm glad.
my prev posts?
fuckit!!!
i was dumb as always
wait more like blurrrrrrrr

anyhooooo.
so i went out with za on friday nyte
and it turns out i met clara there as well
small world
but by the by it was nice meeting her and her bf and his friends.
dint take photos that nite except for one.
wow that was a miracle
but all other photos were taken by erik
and i look so awful in all of them!!!

but it was a fun nyte
wait it was a really nice nite

met zuki, (who is from kch oso.... i knoe.. small world...)
his dad, (whos really really nice.. lol)
erik,
arif,
and few others.

haha
it was a fun nyte
and we'll hafta see whether it can happen again

i wish i could recount everything into this blog but its not safe to do so!!!
haish
problem innit?
hahaha
but its ok coz everyone whos close to me knoes what happened anyway.

ok so moving on
i have this problem
and i admit it.
i'm scared of relationships.
more of i'm scared of getting hurt.
or fear of anything else happening.

what made me realise this was someone asked me whether i believe in love.
and without thinking i said no.
straight out no.

but i so wanna believe in it.
i just havent found reason or cause to do so.
i am wishing someone could make me believe but guess i gotta be patient.
patient
patient
patient
patient
patient
patient.

arent i always patient?
gosh even with a theoretical question i can hear the voices of people saying no.
agaga
anyhoo.
i'm trying.

and i hope i succeed...

[reach for the stars, you might not get it. but you wont end up with a handful of mud.]

i feel random now

hahaha
saje je nak blog.
lol.

hmmm..
now what?

wanna get my liscence
wanna get a job
wanna get my car, do it up and airbrush it
wanna get the airbrush machine

wanna spend loads of time with naem!!!
naem naem naem naem

normah van houdt naem

buuuut..
hes always busy
):

i miss him so muchy muchy much much
i wish he knew that i wanna spend time with him and not his msgs!
frustrating

but yeah

gonna go the distance
haha
reminds me of hercules

miss watching cartoons
sunday mornings.
well i dont get up that early anymore but yeah
lol

ok ok
back to my wants
hehe

i wanna spend time with naem

i wanna spend time with chiq n fiqah

wanna spend time with all 3 of them together
and chris too
hehe

naem if by any chance you're readin this i want you to knoe that i miss you and i want to spend time with you!!!!

plus it would be nice if you woud reply my msgs instead of leaving me hanging.
wargh
jobless and random

weeee

"talk to me dance with me girl.. you're the spotlight"

weee

hot hot heat rocks

recently started listening to them again..

fiqaaaaaah!!! chiq!!!!!
remember when we used to listen to this in your room.
hahahah
damn funny
:P

miss you two like fuck loads!
come back fassssssst

then we have fun
hehehe

normah houdt van naem

Naughty
Adorable
Endearing
Mine! .<33

and while hes with me i dont want anyone else with him. i dont intend on sharing and if he does he wont be with me for long.
he asked me today. and i said yes. but now i have doubts. wht if it was the way it was before? msg in the morning. seldom see each other. no replies at nyte. time can only tell and i hope i made a good choice. i hope hes not like me exs. and i hope i wont get bored fast, i really do.
i cant forget bout him now, but lets hope i do soon. i know i'm not ready, but maybe this will be sort of a preparation.. maybe?
anyhooo i made the decision now just hafta go straight and go for it. hahaha. we'll see how it is. he seems nice. just fucking shy. and i'm the one thats sposed to be shy hahaha.
things have changed, but maybe its coz of the company i'm with. maybe its coz i havent been alone with him. all these maybe's are killing me. for once i'd like to know the ans to something like right now. but maybe its nice not to know the ans. to just drift along. haha. for now he's mine and thats all that matters. muahxxs. syg b.

problems? i think YES

haha. ok so now theres 6 guys. interested in neither. not ready. accept it!!!! if you like me wait. if you dont move on. but most prolly just move on. i dont want to be in a relationship now. and you should know that already. if i havent told you, you should have already seen the signs. like duh! i liked a guy to have him lie to me. i liked a guy to have him cage me. i liked a guy to have him unbearable to be with. i liked a guy to have him play me. and now i'll tell you i'm not ready to have yet another guy chip away bits and pieces of me. i especially dont like a guy who likes me accuse me of liking somebody else just because i talk to him. am i not allowed to talk to anyone i want? have i no free will? am i your pet? or your slave that you can dictate what i do? even if i was with you i'm not your toy. i'm your equal. and if i was with you you'd know that. or if you knew me at all you would know that. i dont like it when another guy refuses to see me just because i'm with his friends. or just because i refuse to meet him somewhere he wants to be. you dont call or message. leave. if you did honestly like me you would make the effort or at least explain why you dont do so. Do not lie to me to gain sympathy or my attention cause when i find out thats fake i will screw you. i'm not someone you can play with and if you think i am i'm sorry. i'm sorry if i dont show my feelings or if i'm quiet i find it hard to be open sometimes and thats just me. i'd like to be with someone who can talk to me and who knows when i'm down or when i'm pretending to be happy. cause thats who knows me for me and no one else. and thats who knows how to take care of me. i dont expect much. but what i do expect is less than most girls would expect from their other halves. just because i'm single that does not give you any right to start anything without my say. if you want to start something please make sure i'm willing or at least not blur or asleep. these are my random thoughts and if you can understand them, and remember them while you're with me i'll salute you.